So, you can feel happy only about present moments. And in our lifetime we have a lot of this kind of moments. Let us explore what is happiness. In which moments do we feel it? Actually, we feel happiness when any of our important values/criteria is fulfilled. These criteria can be really different. It can be love, health, beauty, family, friends, pleasure and anything else. And when any of our criteria is fulfilled in present moment, we feel happy about that. If you are an artist who highly values beauty and deepness, then every sunset can make you feel joy and happiness. If you are a loving mother, then spending time with your children can give you plenty of happy moments. The magic is that our life gives us really a lot of happiness, a lot of moments of fulfillment of our values and criteria.
But sometimes we do not notice all these happy moments. Sometimes something happens that would make us happy, but the magical mechanism to create feeling of happiness doesn't work. And this is because most of us do not live in present. But why? And, where do we usually live then?
First of all, we spend a lot of time in Internet. That means that we are in somewhere, another place than our reality. Our mind is traveling outside of our body. We are sitting here and talking to somebody who is hundreds of miles away from us. Our focus is not here but somewhere else. Another reason is that we do not pay enough attention to our feelings and emotions. We consider them as something not so important, not so real. In fact, our feelings and emotions are the only way to interact with the reality. When we ignore them, we ignore our present reality. And finally, our thoughts are almost always somewhere else. We are thinking about past, about future, about what we have to do, about what may happen to us… There are a lot of thoughts and most of them are not interacting with our current situation.
So, what to do? Here are three most important cornerstones of how to live in the present.
- Live within your body, not outside. Actually, our body is keeps us here. Only through our body we can get information from the reality and we can influence the reality. We can see, hear, touch, taste and smell what is there around us. Spend some time during the day to concentrate on your feelings. Sit down on a calm space and follow to your feelings for a few minutes. Try not to think about anything. Just follow how do you feel your body, what do you see, what sounds do you here, how comfortable it is for you, are you relaxed or are you in tension? Do this exercise every day. After some time you will notice that your feelings became stronger and your life brighter.
- Allow your emotions to live. Because of different reasons (mostly from our childhood) we used to treat our emotions as something not very important, sometimes even something bad. «Boys shouldn't cry». «Girls shouldn't become angry». «Stop laughing and treat your life seriously». These are only a few messages that we have heard in our childhood. As a child, we make a decision that emotions and feelings are dangerous, other people may become angry on us because of our feelings and that we should ignore them and try to focus on something serious. Well, our emotions are the only indicators that we are still alive. Stop ignoring your emotions. Give enough space to each of your emotions. Try to understand what exactly are you feeling? Why? What do your emotions want to tell you? Start living your life, not just passing through it!
- Focus your mind. Try to focus your thoughts on what is going on now. Spend a few minutes to follow what thoughts are coming to your mind. Let them come and go. Are they about current situation or do they refer to past or future? Are they relevant on what are you doing now and where are you now? Do not get rid of your thoughts. Do not try to restrain them. Just let them come and go. Soon you will notice that there is a very pleasant peace in your mind. Soon you will notice that your thoughts become more focused and your mind more concentrated.
Pay attention to these simple steps and very soon you will notice that your life becomes full of presence, full of happiness!
© Blog by Gohar Ghabuzyan at PerfectCoaching.us